May 26th 2015

Well, it's been a few months since my last post. I apologize for that because there'd been ups and downs in my life, as it happens to everyone. My life had changes lately. Some of them are confidential, and some are ones that I would share it out.

Well, Milly Goh had a transfer to another school roughly 1 and a half months ago. It hit me hard, as she was one of my best friends. I sometimes refer her to as my sister. I really miss her presence to be honest, until today still. But, things have to change, and sometimes it's for the better. I do still keep in touch with her on social media, but not that often. We're still friends though, but I really miss her very much. Not being able to see her in class is just...sad.

To that, a new girl actually came in to school during January. I apologize that I never mentioned about her before, as I wasn't quite close to her in any ways, because she's more secretive, and is hard to get things out of her. She was one of the nicest person I've met. WAS. She's 15, one year younger than me. Well, it's not that she's bad now, it's just that we were quite close for the first few months, and then we kind of went down gradually. Probably because she didn't have much friends, and I was kind of the only ones.

Nowadays, she, well, obviously talk to other people, but it seems that she doesn't want to continue this friendship any longer. I'm not sure why though. Nowadays, when I talk to her, it seems that she tries to ignore me somehow, for as I feel that she heard me, but purposely ignores me for some reason. Also, that when I smile at her or anything, she looks away, or pretends she does't see. I feel very sad because of this.

Yesterday, I made her an origami rose out of a tissue paper. I gave it her as a friend or a sister. (Yes, I do refer to as my sister too.) But then she rejected it. My heart sank for a moment, or you can say started going downwards. On and on she rejects my smile or any of my conversations. I'm not sure why, and will ask her dare not I. Well, she has a bunch of other friends now, and it seems that she's much happier with them than me, or should I say better off without me. To she that she's happy, I'm, well, okay with it, so...fine. Of course I still hope we had that kind of close friendship few months ago.

Moving on to Carmen. Well, to be honest, there's nothing much to say about, as it goes to same to other people. Well, I don't know how to say, but it seems that not only her, but nobody in class quite seems to talk to me any longer. I really cannot understand why. Everyone in class has their 'buddy', except for me. Well, I do have 'best-friends', but it seems like it's just a term, because, well, as I mentioned, no one quite seems to talk to me any more. Which makes me feel very lonely. Carmen and Joey are one of my best friends though, but as I said, it's more of just a term I guess.

Raven is the one that I talk to the most for some reason, but her boyfriend is always trying to kill me any second for some reason. Guessing because he doesn't like me to talk to her. Which leaves a partition between us. Well, it's just nature I guess. Nothing much can be done.

Well, life in school is becoming more and more lonely for some reason. I seem to be more and more invisible. Nobody chose to talk to me. When I talk to others, they simply look away, ignore, or just say some words to make me feel like they care, which in fact probably not.

Well, what can I say? Life isn't always at it seems to be I guess. I just have to accept the fact, and live on with it. That pretty much sums up what happened these few months while I was away. There's too, things which I didn't mention, because they're confidential. I, again apologise for that.  Well, that's it for now.

More blog awaits! Stay tuned!

-Jonas